Dear All, Reflections from Haiti 2010

I’ve had a very difficult time talking about Haiti since I returned. I don’t know how to answer questions...especially the vague ones like “How was your trip?”. I just don’t even know where to start. It was so big and powerful. It was so heart wrenching and life changing. It was too significant to respond to that question with a one-word answer like “good” or “great”. I just can’t sell it short like that. From the moment I sat down in my seat on the flight back to the states from Port au Prince I wept. I didn’t cry...I wept. I wanted to stay. There was just so much left to do, so much left undone. I love Haiti. I love Haiti’s people. I love Haiti’s desire to rebuild. I want to help Haiti rebuild. Ten days was just not enough. But for now, ten days is what I have. I walked away with the best ten days that I have lived in a long time. I walked away with the best ten days that I have loved in a long time. I learned to love in Haiti, a real love like Christ offers, an unconditional, radical, crazy love. So what am I bringing back from Haiti? A sense of freedom. Freedom from the American dream. Wreckage of the disgusting idea I used to have of what success looks like. Abandonment of the desire for wealth and the idea that material things will fix us or fulfill us. I could go on and on, but I will keep this relatively short. I want to paint you a picture of Haiti even though I can't possibly accurately explain it to you. The images I have witnessed were painful, reassuring, and uplifting all at the same time. The heartbreak I saw was widespread across an entire country. If I could make you feel the touch of an orphans hands on my face, an innocent child whose parents are somewhere below the rubble of a building, I would do it. I want to show you picture after picture of a country destroyed, 300,000 homes flattened, the small amount of industry they did have in piles of concrete along every street but yet an incredible nation of people who still long for rebirth and renewal. Since I’ve been home I’ve thought so many times of my Haitian friend who lost his family in the earthquake. After escaping a collapsed building he ran home to find his house in crumbles. There among the rubble was the tips of his brother’s fingers. He dug up his brother’s and sister’s cold bodies from the mess that was once his home and right now he is ministering to his people. Feeding them, clothing them, and blessing them. The rug has been pulled from under the nation of Haiti. Every meaningful monument and symbol of hope has collapsed alongside 200,000 Haitian lives. I can't help you smell the bodies of those buried beneath The Cathedral in Port au Prince as they were praying to God, but I can provide the imagery to help you understand the urgency. I can't help you understand disasters, nor can I say that I understand them. All I know is that when disasters like Haiti occur it's an opportunity to wake up and serve, a chance to be the hands and feet of Christ today. We are asked to make disciples of nations. We are asked to serve in the land that we are given. We are asked to give up control. Control of our hands, our money, our time, and our future plans. Why are we so hesitant to do this? Maybe because there is something to be said for “having it together” in America. Well, Haiti has taught me to break free from these expectations. I don't want my plans. I want God’s plans. How can we be okay with self indulgence when there are infants being left in dumpsters to die? How can we be okay with living for self when there is over a million people sleeping in tent cities without food and water? Isn’t time to take care of each other and love each other like Christ has loved? After leaving Haiti, I have returned with ten days of memories, amazing friendships, and millions of reasons why it makes so much sense to live a crazy radical life of love like my Savior, Jesus Christ.

God Bless.